There are teachings in the Bible that are counter intuitive. For example, James teaching us to “count it all joy” when we are facing various trials (Jas. 1:2). The reason teachings like this seem strange is because they are things we learn from conscious reasoning, not instinctive feeling.
Feelings and instinct are often for our immediate protection. Think of your fight or flight response. Imagine someone jumps out and scares you. How does your body react? I say your body because if you were truly frightened you are typically not making a conscience choice to scream and run or take a defensive stance. Similarly with other life circumstances, we have a physical intuitive reaction and a reasoned response. When someone does something or a series of circumstances trigger anger, laughter, joy or arousal, we have a responsibility (Matt. 15:19)
There are basically two choices. We can take the visceral approach. It is the most common and easiest. This way lays the responsibilities of my actions at the feet of my physical body. When we choose this path we say things like, “They made me angry,” “That’s just how I feel” or “The heart wants what the heart wants.” In doing so, we become the victim of circumstance. Our responses to stimuli become predictable animal-like responses.
The other path is one of logic and reason. Not to say it is devoid of emotion, but rather emotion is kept in check with reason. On this path, we still experience love, anger, joy and contentment. However, those emotions are filtered through reason. For example, someone does something that might otherwise trigger anger. But you have your “body under subjection,” and you can take the time to read the situation (1 Cor. 9:27). You can reason that maybe it was an accident. Instead of being a snarling Karen asking for the manager, you can show kindness.
To get to the point where we are masters of our physical bodies we need to understand two things. First, this is something we have to decide in every moment. For example, we might practice self-control with our desires, but we leave our anger unchecked. With all my emotional and physical responses, I must have my body in check to operate within the moral confines of the Scriptures. Second, we have to change our minds and language. We can no longer say, “I don’t feel like going to worship” or allowing our visceral to determine our spiritual. With commandments, it matters very little how we feel. Eventually, we will grow into maturity, and the love or proper motivation will be there. “The way of man is not in himself, that it is not in man who walks to direct his steps” (Jer. 10:23).