Extending forgiveness to someone is hard! It is especially hard when we have been hurt deeply and even repeatedly. Sometimes a person will ask for our forgiveness, and we will be hesitant or resist completely. Sometimes we will not accept a person’s apology because “they didn’t say it just right.” There are many layers to the matter of forgiveness, but consider an example.
Stephen was “a man full of faith and the Holy Spirit” and “wisdom” (Acts 6:3, 5). He preached a compelling sermon on the history of Israel, who ultimately were “the betrayers and murderers” of Jesus Christ (Acts 7:52). In turn, these men also became the murderers of Stephen himself. In his dying breath, Stephen prayed, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin” (7:60).
Had these persons asked for Stephen’s forgiveness? Had they changed their ways? No! They were casting stones at him. Yet, Stephen had a heart of forgiveness, and he did not want any “unforgiving” spirit in him (cf. Rom. 1:31; 2 Tim. 3:3) to keep God from forgiving him (Matt. 6:14-15). Forgiving is hard, but forgiving draws us near the heart of God. That’s what matters!