Clearly-communicated expectations are key to relationships. In the case of God with His people, He has been exemplary in giving us clear communication—not just in our conduct but how we should operate in our many different roles. That is no different in the area of parenting. God has communicated to us what he expects of us as parents.
It should go without saying that we are charged with the physical care for our offspring. Even God’s creation shows us this. Jesus said, “Or what man is there among you who, when his son asks for a loaf, will give him a stone?” (Matt. 7:9). There should be a natural care for them. There are those who neglect even the most basic care for children. Paul wrote to Timothy saying that those who do not take care of their own, “he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Tim. 5:8). Our care for children goes beyond just the physical.
There is a need for us to instruct them. We see this in the Old Testament with the Shema (Deut. 6:7-9). The implication is to make use of every teachable moment. We see in the Proverbs, Solomon saying over and over, “My son, take heed” or “My son, listen to instruction.” We have the responsibility to raise them to know truth, to know God and to know what it is to serve Him. Paul wrote, “But bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph 6:4). Fathers are principally responsible for this task, but both parents have lessons to share (2 Tim. 1:5).
God expects us to model what being His servant looks like, specifically in our relationships with one another (Eph. 5:21-29; Titus 2:4-5). We must be examples in our conduct. There are many passages that teach about our conduct, but Romans 12:9-21 highlights many areas that encompass our Christian walk. We are to be examples in love without hypocrisy (Rom. 12:9), examples in devotion to one another (Rom. 12:10), examples in our devotion to serving God (Rom. 12:11-12), examples in hospitality (Rom. 12:13), examples in how we treat our enemies (Rom. 12:14, 17-21), examples of how we view ourselves inside the body of Christ (Rom. 12:15-16). We need to remember that we could be the greatest stumbling block for our children if we are not modeling what it is to serve God.
Part of parenting is discipline. We are not friends or buddies with our children. We are so much more. We are parents charged with raising a soul to serve the Lord. Discipline must be applied when needed (Prov. 13:24; 19:18; Col. 3:21; Heb. 12:11). With these clear expectations we have been charged with the most rewarding work God could give us.