What does the typical family look like? According to a study by the Counsel of Contemporary Families from September 2014 called, “Family Diversity is the New Normal for America’s Children,” these are the facts. At the end of the 1950s, if you chose 100 children under age 15 to represent all children, 65 would have been living in a family with married parents, with the father employed and the mother out of the labor force. Only 18 would have had married parents who were both employed. As for other types of family arrangements, you would find only one child in every 350 living with a never-married mother! Today, among 100 representative children, just 22 live in a married male-breadwinner family, compared to 23 living with a single mother (only half of whom have ever been married). Seven out of every 100 live with a parent who cohabits with an unmarried partner (a category too rare for the Census Bureau to consider counting in 1960) and six with either a single father (3) or with grandparents but no parents (3).The single largest group of children (34) live with dual-earner married parents, but that largest group is only a third of the total. So, what the author points out is that what we typically think of as the norm is only true for about one third of the children in the United States.
Why is it important to have this information? The concept of family for people coming into the church is going to mean many different things. We can also see the decline of the core family concept and the ideas and moral standards of our society eroding away. But, all is not lost. This is not a doomsday message. No earthly society has been perfect in its portrayal of Christian values.
What do we do? We recognize the challenges that lay before us and apply God’s wisdom to our families. Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3 are two chapters that are key in helping us in our families. Colossians 3 specifically outlines core Christian values then shows how to apply those in the family. Colossians 3:12-17 highlights those positive values that should be manifested in our lives—compassion, kindness, gentleness, humility, patience, forgiveness, love, teaching and admonishing. All these things then need to be applied to wives, husbands, children and fathers (Col. 3:18-21). Imagine a family where these character traits are encouraged and exampled. Then, imagine the kind of legacy they could leave for their children and grandchildren.
Each one of us has a part to play in a family. For we are all sons and daughters of someone. More importantly, we are all sons and daughters of the Most High. It is He who has prepared a legacy for us.