We are all creatures that need approval. We may have different tolerances for rejection, but at some point we all need approval and validation. The question we need to ask ourselves is, “Whose approval am I seeking?”
Consider the following as an evaluation. I might be seeking the approval of others if I…
1. Take disagreement personally.
2. Change or adapt because of apparent disapproval.
3. Don’t say “no” for fear of disapproval.
4. Don’t stand up for myself.
5. Gain attention or acceptance through gossip.
6. Appear to agree with someone when you don’t.
7. Don’t complain when you’ve received poor service.
8. Pretend to know or understand something.
9. Unnecessarily apologize on a regular basis.
10. Expect compliments and fish for them.
11. Fail to cope with any level of criticism.
12. Behave in a way that’s contrary to my beliefs.
If we are seeking the approval of others, there are ramifications with our relationship with God. We are not serving God. “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth” (Matt. 6:24). We become slaves to the whims of others. “Do you not know that when you present yourselves to someone as slaves for obedience, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin resulting in death, or of obedience resulting in righteousness?” (Rom. 6:16). We are only promised death (Rom. 6:23). We are left with no enduring inheritance. “The earth and its works will be burned up” (2 Pet. 3:10).
There are more things to consider. What does my life look like? It will be more aligned with the popular expectation of others than with God. What does my home look like? It will not be guided by the norms of God but society. What does my relationship with my spouse look like? The pure concept of a godly marriage is constantly under attack. We could succumb to the thoughts and concepts that are not what God had intended for marriage. Where am I spiritually with God? If that isn’t my focus, then it is easy to get off course.
While we all need approval, it is important to seek approval in the proper place. That needs to be from God and His people that walk with us and encourage us along the way.